Feel the Feelings!

Last week I found myself going through a rough time. My life which had been flowing with abundance in every area for several months, seemed to come to a halt! Clients were scarce, unexpected large expenses appeared, social outings not happening, the weather turned fall like, and I felt irritated and even a little depressed. I really could not lift myself out of this dark place. I did try to do the uplifting techniques I teach my clients. Nothing seemed to work. So I thought maybe I need to” feel what I am feeling.” I teach this, and write about this concept. Of course we teach what we need to learn! I have never been a real “feeler”. I was taught at an early age don’t cry. So those emotions do not come easily. I do know though when you let yourself feel sad, angry, or frustrated, it allows the feelings to pass and not get stuck. I see it like a weather system. My x used to say when he felt my emotions erupting “a storm is brewing!” This was a great way to lighten the actual experience. He would give me a lot of room to express those feelings by naming the experience this way. Just like a storm if it thunders and lightnings it then passes and the sun does comes out.

Most people do not express what they are really feeling. We are taught in this culture to stuff it, stiff upper lip, put your game face on, and so forth. This in my opinion keeps the energy stuck and always in the backdrop of your life. Never letting feelings pass through you there is a gray dead feeling that lingers. We wonder why most people look like the walking dead? If you do not fully feel the sadness for example you can not fully express the joy. Letting the sun shine again. So I let myself stew and brew for several days. I did not try to put a smile on it. I spoke to a few friends who could hold space for my feelings. I journaled. I did something I call “stompy.” Just like a mad child stomps around with their feet when angry I became “stompy” myself full out . Similar to hitting a pillow this relieves frustration. I let myself lay on the couch and watch bad TV not doing my spiritual practices. I felt sorry for myself. I just dove into the feelings. Lo and behold they did pass. One day I woke up and it was sunny again both outside and in. This void I was experiencing had a purpose. In addition I began to see what I needed to take responsibility for as well. I needed to up my game with my coaching, reach out to friends socially, and be more on top of my budgeting and expenses. I came out of this inspired and clear. My clients returned even some new ones, friends started calling, inspiration and joy returned and so did the flow. I even had some new great ideas for my business! Letting yourself ”feel the feelings” can actually transform the circumstances! It is very self loving and healing! I suggest next time emotions come up that you are trying to avoid, allow yourself to “feel the feelings” and watch what happens. The sun really is always behind those clouds. Amazing miracles can happen from this practice!

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For the last 25 years Cindy has changed thousands of people’s lives through individual sessions, workshops, lectures and retreats. The foundation of her work is the journey to Self-Love.

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